"One more secret smile. One more shared laugh. One more electric kiss. Finding him was like finding someone I didn’t know I was searching for."
Courtney Love is my spirit animal.
Hey! I think everyone’s process of grieving is a little different. I had a pretty dark time myself in recovering to the blow to my heart. It was a bit of a downward spiral & I only started to come out of it when I started to tell myself the truth of what I was to him. It hurt to know I was just another used party in his web, but it gave me the closure I needed to be like “You know what? Fuck that guy. I don’t need him or the games.”
It doesn’t matter how amazing someone seems or how well you think they fit, if they don’t feel the same way or aren’t willing to do what it’d take to make it work & show their love with actions, then they were never really right for you. There’s nothing romantic about someone you always have to be trying to convince to want & love you back.
I like thinking in the terms that you’re the diamond they couldn’t afford. Someone won’t be turned away by your shine & you’ll be better off being with them than you would’ve ever been with the person who was a waste of your time because their feelings or devotion could never match your own.
On top of that I suggest ice cream, friends, & listening to lots of P!nk & watching episodes of “New Girl”. :) xx
Sometimes you wake up to serenades & awesome texts & realize that even if your life sometimes takes a turn for the dark side every now & then, if you breathe it all in, your life is actually pretty majestic.
I may not have got the guy, but I’ve found plenty others & my friends are the best.
I didn’t receive the first part of your question. But dreams are often our subconscious processing information & working through things. It might not have anything at all to do with him if there are other things going on in your life, like recent relationship issues, stresses, etc.
But on the topic of moving on, I don’t think you can really make yourself move on from anyone, at least not in any snap of the fingers way. You can compartmentalize, but unless you legitimately take the time to work through what you’re feeling, then it is just going to pop up over & over again at random times. It took me over four months to get past my last ex (my situation with him sounds similar to yours) & sometimes I fear I’ve just compartmentalized my feelings, but when I think of who he is & what he’s done, not just to me, but to loads of women & how he lies to, uses, & manipulates people almost compulsively, I realize that that isn’t the type of person I want to spend the rest of my life with. I need someone reliable & genuine & truly good hearted & that will put me first as a priority in their life & won’t just bail when it’s time to bite the bullet & put in the work, leaving me to pick up the pieces by myself. I don’t hate him & I’m a friend to him, but I don’t want a lifetime with a coward. Revisit your thoughts & feelings toward him & ask yourself the tough questions. Like, if he really showed up at your door & said he wanted you for real, what would you do? I’d tell my ex to get fucked. If you’re at all doubtful that you’d do the same, then you still have some work to do regarding what happened between you two & that’s entirely okay. We all move on at our own pace.
Hope I could help. X
My mum’s been watching this show & just told me I’m like Chloe.
Best. compliment. ever.
John Green is my hero.